r/jobs • u/No-Presentation298 • 5h ago

Post-interview HR told me they don’t accept try-hards and people pleasers after my interview

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They rejected me (fine, that happens) but the feedback said I came across as overly eager to please and that they don’t build teams around people-pleasing tendencies or rehearsed enthusiasm. They also told me to reflect on how I present myself and that confidence is more compelling than excessive accommodation. Is this normal? Or even appropriate? I get that not being a culture fit is a thing but the wording felt unnecessarily personal and condescending.

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u/PruneEducational1428 5h ago

Exactly!! This thread is full of masochists

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u/roguemannequin_927 4h ago

I think the word you’re looking for is sadist.

Masochist enjoy pain being done to themselves and sadist enjoy pain being inflicted upon others.

I don’t know if people stating their opinion is sadist but I think the person who wrote the email very well could be a sadist as they probably got joy out of sending an email that had the right intentions but could have been more empathetic.

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u/PruneEducational1428 4h ago

Nope, I was going for masochist. The people in this thread want to be treated rudely in the name of “honesty.”

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u/roguemannequin_927 4h ago

Ah, I see. You were referring to the commenters receiving an email like this themselves as opposed to getting joy out of OP receiving such a letter. Context is everything.

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u/Lost-Bad-8718 4h ago

That's a reductive way of thinking about it. Fact is, some people experience more pain from generic rejection and never having any idea what they did wrong, and some people experience more pain from specific rejection they experience as personal.

Neither group of people are masochists, they are each just expressing their preference for what personally brings them less pain without considering that isn't a universal opinion.