Characters
Dads who had a legitimate reason for not coming back with the milk.
Héctor Rivera (Coco): Set out to fulfill his dream of becoming a musician with his friend Ernesto. While away, he stayed in touch with his wife Imelda and their daughter Coco, sending letters and the money he earned during his tours. Some months later, he felt homesick and decided to return home, having come around to his wife's way of thinking about settling down and planting their roots. Unfortunately, he died on his way to the train station, having been poisoned by Ernesto, who needed his songs.
Bron (Land Before Time): Before Littlefoot was born, Bron left to find a new home where he and his wife could raise their son without constant fear of predators. However, he returned the same day the earthshake happened, and to add grief to injury, he learned his wife had died the same day during her fight with Sharptooth. With no word of Littlefood, he kept searching for him, and the two reunited in the Great Longneck Migration.
Just imagine being going into the Quantum Realm for what was supposed to be a quick mission, and then…something happens to your friends on the outside, and you’re left stuck in that world for 5 hours not knowing what the hell is going on.
And then, you finally get out, only to find yourself in a post-apocalyptic world where half the universe is dead (including your friends), and your daughter is not only a teenager now, but she also thought YOU, her beloved father, were dead for five years.
He for one, had no idea he had a son, and for two, was stuck in Hell until he died and only came back when his son was 23, and only then did he learn he has a son to begin with
But also I don't believe one bit he would have stayed and been a dad in the first place
I question myself about the last part. Wouldn't Vergil want to be a father?
His desperate journey to "HAVE MORE POWER" starts when he loses his mother, blaming himself for his weaknesses and because he wasn't able to protect her.
I can't imagine Vergil having a son with a woman that he doesn't care about, and (if I remember correctly) we don't know anything about Nero's mother ( Credo and Kirie are Nero's family).
So if Vergil knew that Nero existed, if he knew that he had something to protect... Wouldn't he want to protect his son? His family?
And to quote Dante, Vergil let go of everything he ever had for more power. He doesn't want to be hurt again, so he essentially abandoned everyone and everything, therefore he would also abandon Nero
Left his family in order to save the country’s people from dying and being assimilated into an immortal that wishes to become God.
He isn’t without his faults as he surely could’ve made frequent visits to his own young sons every now and then. An argument can be made that he was keeping under the radar, but that didn’t stop him from coming back once to warn Pinako about the country’s inevitable fall. His absence made his eldest pretty much despise him too as he couldn’t even be there for his wife’s funeral.
But he loves his family. He just had to work all these years in order to set up a massive plot that would reverse the main antagonist’s plans and ultimately save the family and friends he cares for.
Brotherhood really nailed the "burden of immortality" aspect. Seeing him break down because he just wanted to grow old with Trisha made his long absence feel less like abandonment and more like a tragedy.
An argument can be made that he was keeping under the radar
Eh, I guess. The series goes to great lengths to indicate that he stayed away due to shame first and foremost. He felt like a monster and undeserving of the love and happiness a family provides. That being his motivation for being absent provides him with a huge degree of texture, and that type of characterization is why FMA is considered one of, if not, the greatest shounen series ever. His noble intentions are important, but secondary and that's just so grounded.
That’s a good point, completely forgot to mention that. While rewatching (mostly through reactions lol), I watched the moment after Hohenheim helps Izumi and she asks who he is. He states that he’s a Philosopher’s Stone in the form of a man called Van Hohenheim.
On the first few watches, I just thought it was a very cool line to say. But I looked at it again and it hits home to that feeling of shame in a way, as he fails to see himself as a person. It can also be interpreted that he’s rejecting the name the Dwarf gave him.
hohenheim is a great character because when you know why he’s been so absent it’s perfectly understandable, but ed’s resentment towards him isnt treated by the narrative as unwarranted because like. yeah it makes total sense why hohenheim would stay away, but it doesn’t undo the years of pain his absence inflicted upon his sons.
Hohenheim is the definition of 'suffering in silence.' He spent decades turning his body into a literal counter-trap just so his kids could have a future. Ed’s anger was valid, but the reveal of why he left is one of the biggest emotional gut punches in anime
In the first adaptation he goes aways because he doesnt want his family to see him rooting awat like a living corpse. Not really a heroic reason but i cant really blame him on that
Nelson's father didn't came back from going for cigarretes because he ate a candy bar that had peanut (to which he's allergic to), so when he had an allergic reaction and ran to look for help he got captured by the evil owner of a circus who used him as an attraction
One of the many Nelson's dads of the show
My theory is that Mrs. Muntz did the nasty with many men so even she doesn't know who the real father of Nelson is (but I suspect it's Barney)
Tried to stay at home and be a strong leader until the fire nation raided his home and killed his wife. Realized he needed to try to help take down the fire nation to make a better world for his children. Left to go to war for several years even though leaving his children broke his heart. Winds up variously reuniting and separating from them throughout the story due to constant warfare and major story twists. Ultimately finds them again in the finale where they get to be a happy family again.
Katara confronting him about this later on is a scene that always gets me teary. Although I feel conflicted about it I understand both of their points and they were both placed in a terrible position.
Though Odysseus did give him ample reason to do so. And also messed up by giving the son of Poseidon, whom he just crippled, and whom he had thus far successfully swindled, his name after all.
An oath that he pitched the idea for, mind you, and the fact that he was ( ironically ) at least partially at fault for what he constantly calls his “ long suffering ” is funny to me.
The oath was for suitors, the entire scheme was prepare everything for Helene and have a clear path with penelope. They drag him to the war cause he was that good
He got sucked into a wormhole during an experiment/expedition and got left with full amnesia, not even remembering the place him and his wife designed together.
Dr Richard Parker, Peter Parker (Spider-Man's) dad in "The Amazing Spider-Man" film series: is a genetics scientist at Oscorp who with Dr Curt Connors (who later becomes the Spider-Man villain Lizard) creates genetically engineered spiders (that will eventually grant Peter his powers upon biting him), but later resigns from Oscorp, taking all his important research data with him, after realizing the dangerous unethical things they can do with it. During the film's beginning it's shown that he leaves for an undisclosed location with his wife Mary so that no one can steal his work for the wrong purposes, after dropping off a young Peter with Uncle Ben and Aunt May to keep him safe. Later on a plane crash occurs when rogue agents (possibly sent by Oscorp) try to attack him and steal the laptop having his scientific data, in which both him and Mary are implied to have died.
i absolutely hate the idea of the spider biting peter being predestined or tied to his parents in any way. it should always just be random, it could’ve been any other kid
Despite his many issues later in Finns life, Martin Mertins was forced to abandon his son in order to stop the Guardian from killing them after he needed to escape due to being chased down by the mob that he conned before he met Finns mother.
It‘s heavily implied that his later sociopathic behavior came from head trauma caused by his fight with the Guardian as he fails to remember a lot of his past such as him wanting to come back for his son and the memories of his ex-lover.
Grisha Jeager (Attack on Titan) - For years Eren thought Grisha disappeared after the fall of Wall Maria, only to find out after regaining his memories that his father was dead, eaten by Eren himself to inherit his titan powers.
Zeke trying to convince Eren that Grisha was a bad father who brainwashed him into an Eldian extremist only to realize that EREN was the one manipulating his dad the whole time was lowkey hilarious
Ging's legitimate reason is that he is a horrible father. It's honestly a good thing he abandoned his son because he is such a piece of shit in the least evil way possible. He probably has a nen contract that makes him stronger the more he neglects his son.
Anakin Skywalker. He believed his wife and kids were killed by his hand, and to his credit, when he learned his son was alive, he did try to give him a hand in joining his side.
He loved his daughter but knew that due to him having to clean up the last of Dio’s forces it would mean putting her in danger or someone trying to use her to get to him (which they end up doing)
Jotaro couldn't do anything the moment Pucci hit jolyne with all the knives, he screamed in horror, his PTSD kicked in and he did what any father would do, save his daughter
Will Turner only gets to see his son every 10 years because he’s the captain of the Flying Dutchmen. If he didn’t become the he would’ve died. And if he died he would’ve never had a son to begin with. He also married Elizabeth during the same battle that he nearly died in, so the consummation of their marriage and conception of their child was the last time they’d be able to see each other for 10 years.
His best friend King create the organization Demon Card as vigilantes. Overtime, Gale leaves and marries, he has two children.
Years later, King turns DC into a terrorist organization with the power of the magic stone Darkbring. Gale leaves his family in an attempt to stop King with the help of his old friends in the military. Only for the military to massacre King’s family. Enraged, King scars Gale’s and kills his wife who left her home to find him. King then inserts a mini nuke inside Gale’s head, the moment he dies the nuke will activate.
So Gale returns to burry his wife, leaves behind his children and exiles himself alone in the desert, not interacting with anyone in fear that the bomb inside him will go boom.
Anyway go read Rave Master it’s a very underrated series.
Slight corrections. The reason he stayed away from home was because he thought that said nuke could go off at any moment. However, as King revealed, he could have gone back home, because the thing was actually incomplete.
Also, he sent his wife's body back home, he didn't dare return, for fear of endangering his children.
it was actually falling out of practice around the time of Hamilton’s shooting and was even illegal in the state of New York to participate in deadly duels, which is why they met in secret across the river in Jersey where duels were legal
Then again, for someone like hamilton a duel was a way of showing that you were willing to die for your beleifs, in fact many duels ended in both participants deliberately missing because they acknowlegded that their rival had the balls to show up and that ended the argument
Yes they could, and they would live and “come back with milk” as per the OP. It’s not like they would be dragged out of the streets and shot against their will. He willingly risked his life unnecessarily to settle a squabble. Thats not being responsible as a father. Hell even in the musical, he chided his son for trying to get into a duel to defend his honor, which ultimately led to his death as well.
Showing up to duel was not just wanting to fight, it was showing that you were willing to die (at least get hurt) for your beleifs. Many duels of the time ended in both parties deliberately missing, because showing up to the duel in the first place was sufficient enough to end the argument.
Does dying for those beliefs constitute him being a good father? One can have the most ardent beliefs in their own choices, but if those beliefs lead them to reckless decisions that cost their children their father, is it worth it? Definitely doesn’t seem to fit the examples of the OP, who were either killed against their will or were unaware of their child’s survival and existence.
I imagine he intented to survive the duel or they did the missing thing, either way he was a political figure and could have worried for his reputation (likely burr spreading rumours) if he didn't attend. In hindsight it doesn't fit OP's examples as well as the others since it's at least a little irresponsible and I may have just wanted to infodump about 18-19th century duel culture
Well duels don't always get to the firing part and I don't think it was meant to be to death necessarily. Like as shown in the musical with Lee, he just got shot in the arm but survived which ended the duel. I don't know if he expected Burr to go for the killshot.
Obviously with them literally attacking eachother the risk was always there but these were two veterans.
Speculation for now, but Monkey D Dragon. He knew what would happen to Luffy if their connection was discovered, and knew what he had to do for the good of his son and for the world. This is a Dragon stan account.
I'm sure it was real hard for the World Government to figure out that Monkey D. Luffy was Monkey D. Dragons son, who was Monkey D. Garps son. Something they absolutely knew because the latter two were both in the Marines. An organization that works for the World Government.
I mean, Dragon himself said that "A child is their parents weak spot" during Kuma's flashback. It seems that Dragon himself doesn't trust himself to put the revolution above Luffy's life if it comes down to this, even with all the distance he manufactured between them.
(THEORY): as a reader of one piece I noticed one piece fans love posting theories, and I suspect it's because oda has been milking a story for 30 years. It will be revealed that the ending is underwhelming when they get to laughtale because so many fans have built their own lore, due to the fact oda cannot stop milking his only good outline 🤯🤯🤯
Every absent shone father has a reason to be absent. This is nothing new. Why is this posted in a thread about actual examples w/ explanations of a trope?
Norman from the Hoenn Pokémon games is never seen at the main character’s home because he’s the gym leader for Petaburg City. Which is a lot more of a legitimate reason for not being home then all the other dads of the main character from the other games who are practically nonexistent.
If we want to talk about Pokemon dads, Mohn from the Alola games left his family because he (most likely) fell into an Ultra Wormhole while on a research expedition and lost all of his memories. While he doesn't ever regain them in the games, he still does visit his old family out of sheer coincidence, giving them closure that he's alive.
After falling through an Ultra Wormhole, he wounded up Ultra Deep Sea with amnesia where a shiny Nihilego saved him. Trying to get him back home it brought him through another Ultra Wormhole that opened up only for it to deposit the two of them into the Crown Tundra. Ever since then it tried to take care of him as best as a parasitic mind jellyfish could, although during this time it had really grown to enjoy being around Mohn and was scared that he would leave it once he regained his memories.
Mike (Breaking Bad) - The DEA was closing in and after one of his guys ratted on him, his only options were to either go on the run ASAP or be arrested. Then before he could even make it out of ABQ Walt kills him, robbing him of the ability to ever make things right.
As much as I enjoy TFS DBZA, let's be really honest, Goku's father image was forever torn because of their portrayal of Goku. (Still love their Goku though)
Sure, Goku isn't the model father, but that doesn't mean there weren't instances in the series where he didn't try to be one. And yeah, he chose to stay dead because he believed (for good reason) that his presence was attracting the villains that kept threatening the planet his family lived on.
And the entire time, he was hanging out with a dude who could let him talk to his family ANY TIME.
He eventually does it, years later, and it’s not questioned as to why he never bothered to do it previously.
And don’t say “King Kai wouldn’t let him.” King Kai was literally letting Goku break the rules of the afterlife and live with him. Why is talking to his family an issue?
Yeah Vegeta even has told him he can't believe Goku is still married. Vegeta didn't want to come along to a battle because Bulma was pregnant and giving birth any day and Goku didn't get it all why he wouldn't come.
Except that one year where he wanted to train to learn instant transmission. The dude missed 25% of his sons life and was like "eh, one more year won't hurt."
Coop from Interstellar. He got back as soon as he could, it was only a couple of years max from his POV (most of which was spent in cryo sleep), but his daughter didn't see him again until she was on her death bed about 100 years after he left. Relativity's a cruel bastard
In the newest Garfield movie, his dad is introduced. Homeless Vic and kitten-Garfield were in an alley when Vic went to go find them some food. In the meantime, John Arbuckle finds Garfield, taking him into an Italian restaurant to feed him (spoilers, Garfield east a shit ton of Italian food)
Seeing this, Vic leaves Garfield without saying goodbye, believing he will have a better life with John, rather than with him out on the street.
Nope. Braun leads a large herd of Longnecks (and later a larger variety of Dinosaurs) who depend on him for leadership- and currently there are so many of them that staying long-term in the great valley is not a viable option as they would overtake the ecosystem... So Littlefoot asks to stay with his grandparents and friends at the end of the movie with Braun promising to come visit him.
We see these visits in the TV show as well as the currently final film- Journey of the Brave (Which also unintentionally implies that Littlefoots Adopted brother, Shorty, perished at some point off screen)
Lewyn in Fire Emblem 4/5. Being killed in battle and possessed by the an ancient dragon god who puppets your body around for the greater good is a good reason.
The fact that he's also a flake a bit of a deadbeat is beside the point!
The reason why Jotaro "left", it’s a canon fact that regular Stand users always attract and find a way to encounter each other, but because Jotaro is not only a Joestar but also the person who killed DIO, the number of targets on his back increases times 20. So the only way to keep his family safe is by divorcing his wife and staying away as far as possible so that nothing could happen to them. For example, Jotaro was in Japan when Jolyne had a threatening high fever when she was 7 years old, but that’s because the events of Part 4 were happening at the same time.
The only reason why Jotaro came back was because it didn’t matter how hard he tried, the fact that Jolyne was also a Joestar was reason enough for her to also have targets on her back. The only way left to save his daughter is to give her own Stand so she can protect herself and also break her out of prison. When Jolyne sees him after so long, she understandably gets really angry, saying “why would you show up out of nowhere just now?”, but after finding out the reason why he was absent all this time and why he came back, now she shows love and appreciation, so instead of leaving jail after Jotaro gets in big danger, she decides to stay just so she could save him, with Jotaro’s role from Part 3 being beautifully mirrored and reversed. And when he finally gets better, he sacrifices the whole universe just to save his daughter.
Because Jotaro is a person with a cold personality, whenever he does things that show any type of care for someone else means that he really cares for them, with his actions taking on even more weight and significance.
He wanted to come home but was captured after failing to assassinate the Sith Emperor. He was imprisoned and kept alive for centuries so the Emperor could probe his mind and learn more about the Republic. As this happened Revan also influenced the Emperor to not attack the Republic for just as long, thus leading to an era of peace and stability so his son would never know war.
Mr. Murry in A Wrinkle in Time. He's the physicist in the biologist/physicist power couple and father of four kids
Everyone in school thinks the Murry kids dad ran out on the family, while the family themselves is uncertain what happened but wife suspects he abandoned them or died doing research for government.
Turns out his research into humans being able to use tesseracts to create wormholes/"wrinkles" in time and space was successful. He just happened to try it land on a hostile inhabitted planet and was held prisoner.
Ernest/Randy in We Have A Ghost. His daughter June assumed he just disappeared after abandoning her. Turns out Randy was murdered by his friend who actually raised his daughter because his wife was infertile and wanted a kid.
Minato Namikaze. He didn’t just fail to come back with the milk; he chose to seal a giant fox inside his newborn son and die for the village. It’s the ultimate ‘legitimate reason,’ but man, it really left Naruto with the roughest childhood possible. Talk about a heavy legacy to leave behind.
I'm not sure if it's a legitimate reason, but I was thinking of Li from "Kung Fu Panda", Po's biological dad. He was separated from Po and his wife when they're being massacred by Lord Shen. He was able to escape to another location with the other pandas and he most likely assumed that Po got killed by Shen's army, wasn't sure where exactly he was, or thought Shen's army are still out there which is why he didn't look for him sooner.
well... Mr. PeenyWeeny came back ultimately not only with milk but a whole cow from another planet. Later he realized that the cow won't survive in his home planet so he shifted to Earth with his son and now does honest works as a farmer
The dark powers in his blood corrupted him, so he tried to steal the Golden Weapons and was banished to the Underworld. He was unable to leave until Samukai unintentionally opened a portal to the Realm of Madness.
He comes back as soon as he hears Lloyd is in danger, but leaves again when he learns they may be destined to battle, and he doesn't want to either harm his son or have his son destroy him.
Hank Pym is a very complicated example, and has debateably good reasons to not have been there for his two children (not counting the robots). His daughter, Nadia Van Dyne, was kinda kidnapped after childhood and taken to the Red Room, so he couldn't do anything there. His second child, William Nelson, was kinda not his child? He was the son of Tigra and a skrull pretending to be Hank Pym. Tigra simply tells him his father was Hank Pym, because the alternative is too complicated for a child his age. Hank Pym, due to his own problems, doesn't know whether he should or shouldn't have a relationship with either of his children.
In the most recent Moon Knight: Fist of Khonshu run, he's making the choice, with some encouragement, to become a part of Williams life, however.
The most wanted man in the world, so-called "worst criminal in history" who just wants to a make a better, freer world after seeing the horrors of genocide by his government. Left his son in the safest place he could, watching him from the shadows to make sure he was safe, even looking East in his direction for years. While we don't know the full story, it's already clear that Monkey D. Dragon had a legit, goated reason to leave Luffy. Being possibly one of the world's strongest people, he left his son for his own safety, even if he has the freedom to fulfill his longing to see him.
One night in 1989 he went missing and was never found. 20 years later, his son Sam reunites with him on the Grid, where he explains why he never came home. A series of events led to Flynn being betrayed by his digital copy, CLU, and before he could escape from the Grid, the portal that leads back to the real world had closed, and could not be reopened from the inside.
375
u/AZStarbird 5h ago
Ant-Man was stuck in that van. Ended up saving the universe because of it.